wheres the love? It's on the inside...
"Passed the road to your house, that you never called home. Where they turned out your lights, though they say you'll never know......When they pumped out your guts, and filled you full of those pills. You were never quite right, deserving all the chills." Better then Ezra - Despirately Wanting
So I promised last night, but as usual, I didn't get home from work till late, and when I did get home, I just went straight to bed.
Ya know. I'm kind of pissed. Really though, why don't any of you talk to me anymore? Grant it, I'm not online all the time, but when I am here, why not show the love? A phone call once a year would be super, but I'm not even asking for that, just a mere impersonal IM. Guess thats too much to ask as well...
Back to less depressing matters. My birthday went rather well. Jacob bought me a guinea pig. He is SO damned cute! HE runs arround the house and makes these really cute squeaking noises when he's happy. I named him Elliot. Just sooo adorable. heh.
My party was on Sunday, my family came, my mom's bf, and Jacob's parents, and Brandon H. (Jacob's best friend, not my Brandon; Brandon C.) I got a chocolate cake with raspberry filling and whipped cream icing. It had a purple hippo on it! A FRIGGIN PURPLE HIPPO! I was estastic! The cake was way nummie.
Then I opened gifts, I got a few old navy gift cards, cash, a stuffed hippo from John, a borders giftcard, and Jacob's parents sent me flowers at work on my birthday. :D
My mom's boyfriend, Jay, made bananas foster. It's bananas, cinnamon, brown sugar, with rum and brandy, set on fire(!), and served over ice cream.
NUMMIE! NUMMIE! NUMMIE!
Also on my birthday, work had cake and sang for me. Pretty nice of them. The cake was lemon filled though. :p
All and all it was a good birthday. Not the best, certainly not the worst.
So at work, I finally got a new assistant. She's 18, blonde, thin, tall, and in a sorority. Naturally, we are polar opisites. Now before you get your self all hot and bothered with her, let me go into further detail. Yes, she is 18, tall, thin, and blonde. Nothing to expalin about that. But her sorority, thats another story. She is in a christian sorority. They aren't allowed to swear, drink, do drungs, have sex, or date anyone that does any of those things.
To top it off, she's one of those "happy" people. You know the type. Always flowers and sunshine. Never anything wrong. Not a bad thing to say.
The kind I loathe.
So, if you can recall. My other part-time assistant, Michael. Is a mormon. More specifically, he takes religion to a new extreme. No caffiene, no sexual THOUGHTS, no masterbation, church, church, church. Ugh. So becuase he is so sexually repressed, he masterbates at work in the morning when no one else is there yet. Yes. I've checked the history. Yes, he was suspended form work for a month, WITH PAY! Yes, he is STILL doing it.
Moving right along. Mike has been dating the same girl for about 5 years now. So, the other day at work, she calls for him, they talk, he hangs up, and just says.
Mike:'You know, Nikki and I are more like friends now then ever before.'
I say, "oh really? Since when? Last week you were talking about how great she is!"
Mike: 'Well, I don't know if she realizes it or not, but I sure do.'
New assistant Adria: "who's nikki?"
Me: Mikes girlfriend...
Mike: 'Well, like I was saying, she's not really my gf anymore.'
WTF?
After a 5 year relationship, things just don't go from great one week, to "we drifted apart" the next.
So, then Mike gives Adria his wallet to look through. I don't know about you out there, but to me, this could be flirting.
After she was part way through it, I say "Hey Mike, you never showed me your wallet." So Adria hands it to me, and I go through the pictures, and ever girl I come accross, I ask, "is this Nikki?" He looked pissed.
So these two are ordering supplies online. She is sitting next to him, poking him, he pokes her, he shoots a gum band at her, she shoots back, poke, poke, poke.... Then she moves closer, because "she can't see the monitor." Maybe she needs glasses, because, I can see the 20 inch monitor from my desk, 4 feet away. So she was basically in his lap the whole time.
She follows him everywhere, except to the bathroom. And if she could, I'm sure she'd try.
Carrie asked me, how I liked my new assistant. I told her I didn't. She said, "well her and michael seem to be hitting it off pretty well." And, I thought I was the only one, that could see the total obviousness of those two sexual tension!
What really iced the cake for me, was this. We work next to a strip club. You can hear them, and you can hear the music. So, they were playing Brittney Spears. Mike says,
"you know, alot of guys think Brittney is hot. Not me, she has a bad attitude. It's the inside that makes you hot. If you have a good personality, then you are pretty. Like, Shakira, she's really hot because she's got a great attitude. If you have a bad attitude, then you can be whoever, but you are still going to be ugly."
I could of fucking choked.
What the fuck does he think he is doing? Attitudes are hot. Yeah, I'm sure you go nuts over (no pun intended) "Hot sorority house 5! Becky's initation." Because Becky is so cheerful about receiving it. Give me a break. If you want a "hot attitude" bang Mother Theresa. Now THERES something to think about....
<--Was * Is-->
Visit Jacob and Shannon's wedding page
Last 5:
older isn't always wiser - Wednesday, Jan. 25, 2006
- - Tuesday, Jan. 24, 2006
- - Sunday, Dec. 04, 2005
I'm maried!!! - Monday, Sept. 19, 2005
Next week I'll be a wife - Monday, Sept. 05, 2005
